saw this massive onion bigger than my entire hand in the produce aisle and immediately snatched it up solely to weigh it and a guy across the aisle asked how much it weighed because he was curious as well and when i told him it was two pounds he excitedly was like “it’s like the biggest one i’ve ever seen..” humanity rocks moment. bonding with strangers over giant onion
i have witnessed unspeakable horrors . the horrors weren’t undescribable or anything, i just had to sign an NDA
this isn’t a new or hot take or anything but the current trend of people just recording strangers in public is so fucking annoying and low key terrifying. the fact that someone can decide that i’m moving weird at the grocery store and record a video of me and get it reposted by barstool sports or whatever on tiktok makes me want to maul someone
me @ astarion: go pick this lock
astarion: easyyyyyy *twirls hair and rolls a 2*
she’s just a girl and she’s on fiiireeee
saying something you know will make people laugh. And they do laugh.
Kyle Gordon - Planet of the Bass (feat. DJ Crazy Times & Ms. Biljana Electronica) [Official Video]





